Wolverine Walks the Wilderness Coast

Usually Jan is just a regular feminist lefty academic, trying to make the world a better place in her own small way. This is the story of how she came to realise that she has a special power.

The story begins in a little Cafe in Mallacoota. While eating lunch Jan suddenly had the desire to perform this special gesture on her iPhone, and almost instantly had a greater realisation of who she was and what she was doing.

iPhone Off

Later that evening she found herself reverting to baser animal instincts. Dinner which was supposed to be a delicately crafted pasta ended up as just a bunch of ingredients mixed up in a bowl and slurped down. The next morning she and I went off for a walk along the beach from Thurra River towards Mallacoota (a mere 60km).

Pushed on by Strong Winds

Although we were pushed on by near gale force winds, it was a pretty long way, and we were very tired when we finally rolled in to Wingan Inlet that night. Both of us were aching, and Jan’s legs were so tired she could barely walk.

The next morning a transformation had occurred. In my case the transformation was from sore legs to very sore everything, but Jan had not only recovered completely but seemed to have gained something in strength and enthusiasm. Looking back, it seems obvious that no normal human could exhibit such a recovery, but at the time I was simply too astonished to care. Our next task was to swim the icy waters of Wingan. I was a bit concerned that even removing my puffy jacket would be more than I could bear;

Walking towards Wingan Crossing

But Jan seemed to feel no pain as she stripped off and dashed straight into the water

Jan Swimming across

To be honest I’m not sure how I survived, but we ended up on the other side, and after putting on all my warm clothes again I breathed a sigh of relief.

Ira Pain

For the rest of that day we walked along spectacular beaches

IMG 0112

and endless fields of wild flowers

Wild flowers

But it wasn’t enough to take my mind off Jan’s strange behaviour and her miraculous recovery. Another point that came to mind is that her skeleton is in fact bonded to metal. Eventually I realised that there was only one possible explanation. Jan must have that condition, known as being of “Wolverine”.


That night I broke the news to her. She looked grave for a while, but then resolved to use her power for good and not for evil.

Jan Smile

The next day she merely used it for survival when scaling treacherous rocks, crushing ticks, and beating back snakes.

Jan scaling rocks

Now that we’re back home in Hurstbridge things are pretty normal … for now.

The End.

PS: This walk was so totally awesome that if I tried to just tell you how good it was I’d just be writing awesome, awesome awesome down the page. Aside from Jan’s great personal revelation some other highlights were the dunes, the tannin coloured inlets, and of course the wildlife. We saw 45 species of birds without even trying, including a very friendly Golden Whistler, Soaring Sea Eagles, a brief glimpse of a Southern Emu Wren, and a super close encounter with a Yellow Tailed Black Cockatoo. This dragon on the last day even let us get close enough to take its photo


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.